Poem - MAG Poetry Prize 2010
Times
by
East Barnet, UK
You sat at the bar in black
leather
drinking Guinness
I insulted the coat
you flattered
my eyes
We sat on the
windowsill in the pool room
I laughed at the boys
you asked me to kiss
you
We sat in the lounge
late at night
I drank too much
you told me you loved me.
I lay in your bed- feigning
sleep
you sang Irish folk songs
and moved your back
closer to mine
I shut my eyes
and breathed you in
We soiled the kitchen-
together.
I cleared up the dishes
and left you the
spider plant
it grew
like us
and then stopped
restless
in its’
tiny
pot
Added: 31.01.2010




07.05.2010
I liked the emotional truth here. Visual pic of black leather and Guinness works well & spider plant idea. Reconsider title and line breaks?
31.05.2010
Still like this. Have read many times. Initially read as if a male narrator, but works equally well read as a female. Re-draft "soiled" tho?